Eastern Promises

I'm going to PEI to visit our family cottage in less than a week and I'm really looking forward to it. The cellphone reception is poor or null and the landscape is picturesque and billboardless, but the experience of being there is always very healing.
In celebration of this voyage, I bring you a never-before-published-online and rather ancient Island recipe for moonshine. The source is unknown, but the writer certainly has a sense of humour.
If this were not a blog (and I were in elementary school),  I would have handwritten the recipe and browned the paper in the oven. 


"Moonshine"
(Old family recipe)
1 gallon molasses
2 yeast (dry or cake)
5 lbs white sugar
8 gallons water


The Brew
Heat water to 100 degrees F and place in a 10 gallon crock or wooden container. Add molasses and sugar. Stir until they are completely mixed. Prepare the following in advance: 2 yeast with 3 tbsp of sugar in 1 pint of water (body temperature.) Maintain at this temperature for about 3 hours.
When molasses, sugar and water solution reach body temperature, add prepared yeast. Container should be wrapped with quilts, blankets or any other insulating material and out of sight of thirsty neighbours, mounties and the like. In high traffic it is best to place 10 gallon container in a straw-lined hole in the woods. Place an old storm window over the container to keep woodland creatures out and use the sun as a heat booster. Using neighbours' woods will help cut down on your exposure to government agents.
At this point, it is only necessary to check the brew once a day to ensure it is a "rolling work." You will detect the pleasant odours of things to come. Drinking the solution at this point will result in a rather  severe headache.
While the brew is working (10-14 days) prepare the can, plug, worm and tub.


Equipment
1 8 gallon cream can (be sure it doesn't leak)
1 piece green juniper 6 1/2 inches long, tapered to fit can neck, drill 1/4 inch hole through for plug
1 bed sheet, torn into 2 inch wide strips
1 wash tub
15 feet 1/4 inch copper tubing (known as "the worm")
quantity of ice or cold water
quantity of flour and water paste
As soon as it stops working you must proceed to the final stage of operation.


Running the Shine

This phase is traditionally carried out late at night. Before running the shine or assembling the equipment, tack blankets over all windows and doors must be locked. This simulates a "nobody home" situation.
To proceed, clean the can and fill it with half the brew. Dip and fully saturate the strips of sheet into the flour paste and wrap this around the juniper plug and the top of the can. Be extra sure the plug is tight. Wrap further strips of saturated sheet around plug and top of can.
Uncoil 4 feet at one end of copper tube and 2 feet at other end. Starting 4 inches in from 4 foot end, wrap paste strips tapering away from end. Press this end into into 1/4 inch hole in juniper plug. Wrap extra paste strips around the tube and tie down the top of the can. The coiled section of tube must be submerged in a washtub filled with coolant and kept under constant watch throughout the entire operation.
Coolant should never feel warm to the touch. Slowly heat the can, allowing heat to reach the dough-encrusted top. This provides the necessary sealing. Once the heating has started, it is advisable to blow into the end of the worm to be sure it is free from obstructions. Failing to do so can result in the entire apparatus exploding. This whole process should be done, if possible, in the neighbours' woods or backshed to ensure you don't get in trouble with the revenuers! 
Try to pick a night they are not home- to cause as little fuss as possible.
Place a mason jar under the end of the worm. Heat slowly until fluid (moonshine) appears in the mason jar. At this point, check all the dough encrusted areas for proper sealing. Leaks can be detected by passing a match around the sealed area. Adding more sheet and paste will reseal any leaks.
Discard the first couple of ounces of shine. Keep the heat even so that the shine comes in short bursts. Continually check the colour and stop running once you see the shine go from clear to blue tinted fluid. Repeat for other half of the brew.
Shine can be consumed immediately!!! Purists prefer to wait for a few hours before drinking!!!
- Anonymous